Testimony by Ashley Brubaker
Pennsylvania, USA
Posted 11/ 3 /04
*******
I’m not really sure where to begin. There is so much I want to share with you of how the Lord has been working in my heart. It is so exciting…and it is all to the Glory of God!
One night about two months ago, I was feeling really down, kind of depressed. I felt like I kept failing in my walk with the Lord. I was letting the world’s standards and expectations of what I was suppose to be in their eyes (i.e. going to college, etc.) interfere with what the Lord wanted for me. And I also knew that my personal devotions and prayer time was not what it should be…I was too caught up in concerning myself with things that really didn’t matter—that had no eternal purpose.
As I confronted those thoughts, I felt that there was a war going on between my flesh and spirit. As Paul said in Romans 7:19 “For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.” It felt like I was always asking for the Lord’s forgiveness, and sometimes I hesitated because I was afraid to ask again, wondering if the Lord heard my prayer.
I knew I needed to get my heart right with the Lord. I prayed for forgiveness, asking Him to mold me and make me into what I ought to be. And as I prayed, I began to feel at peace and I knew—without a doubt—that I reached Heaven’s gate! And what a glorious treasure that is! When you begin to feel a comforting peace surround you and feel the burden lift from your shoulders and even sometimes the tears fall down your face…you know you’ve tapped into the presence of His Holy Spirit.
I asked the Lord to show me and teach me something from His Word. I took out my Bible and opened to a passage in Psalms. It was Psalms, chapter four, that became my favorite and most treasured verses that night—because it was delivered to me by the hands of the Lord Jesus himself.
As I read Psalms 4, I was so moved by the Spirit of God! Those verses were exactly what my soul needed! And you know, the Lord works like that. Showing us exactly what we need to hear; to change us, to strengthen us, to go on and serve Him. Let me share with you what the Lord has shown me…
(1) “Hear me when I call, O God of my righteousness: thou hast enlarged me when I was in distress; have mercy upon me, and hear my prayer.”
King David must have felt the same way. “…have mercy upon me, and hear my prayer.”
(2) “O ye sons of men, how long will ye turn my glory into shame? how long will ye love vanity, and seek after leasing? Selah.”
My walk with the Lord was not what it should have been and I was letting the world distract me.
(3) “But know that the LORD hath set apart him that is godly for himself: the LORD will hear when I call unto him.”
This verse just stood out to me, I knew it was the Lord impressing this upon my heart. He sets apart those that are godly for Himself!! Isn’t that an exciting thought! And then it says, “the LORD will hear when I call unto him.” Wow! It’s not that I didn’t know that but the Lord reconfirmed it for me when I needed it the most!
(4) “Stand in awe, and sin not: commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still. Selah.”
“STAND IN AWE” were marvelous words to me that night and still are! Those three words were sweeter to me than gold! The Lord was showing me to stand in AWE because He has set me apart for himself and that He does hear my prayer! Oh, how He truly, truly does! Praise you, Lord! Thank you, JESUS!
The latter part of that verse was amazing, too—because that’s exactly what I was doing. I was on my bed, searching my heart, praying, listening to God’s still soft voice.
(5) “Offer the sacrifices of righteousness, and put your trust in the LORD.”
(6) “There be many that say, Who will shew us any good? LORD, lift thou up the light of thy countenance upon us.”
(7) “Thou hast put gladness in my heart, more than in the time that their corn and their wine increased.”
(8) “I will both lay me down in peace, and sleep: for thou, LORD, only makest me dwell in safety.”
As I read that, I wept in repentance and cried out to the Lord in prayer, with a humble heart, full of thankfulness and praise for Him, whose Name is above all others!
That night, I truly felt—with my whole being—like I was touched by Heaven! As the apostle John said in John 3:27, “A man can receive nothing, except it be given him from heaven.”
And the Lord gave me these words…
God has called me,
And I stand in awe—
Of His everlasting grace to me.
From shame and vanity
He has called me,
Unto His wonderful way.
His voice whispers in my ear,
His love surrounds my heart,
His Word gives me the strength,
To know…
Jesus is my Lord,
Always and forevermore.
I hear His voice,
I feel His love,
I know His strength,
Oh, Praise His Name!
Lift up your hands in worship,
Shout to the world…
HE IS YOUR KING!
That night the Lord renewed my spirit and moved me to action…
“Only one life so soon is past…Only what’s done for Christ will last!”
